Conscious Parenting
Judging requires effort. Anger requires effort. Believing and reacting to thoughts about what “should be happening” requires effort. Believing and reacting to thoughts like “this is more than I can do” or “people are asking too much of me” requires effort. These are the things that are actually draining, not what is happening in the moment.
If people imagine that they are needed to do more than they think they are physically able to do, this can be a very stressful thought. But often what is actually happening in those moments is that they are either not realizing what their capabilities are, or they are misinterpreting what is actually needed in that situation.
I experienced this early on when my infant daughter would cry, I would put out a lot more energy than was necessary as I tried to “fix the problem”, and would feel exhausted and nervous about not being able to calm her. Then my husband pointed out that all the baby ACTUALLY needed in that moment was for me to be still and present, and look at her with presence. And it was true. I realized that I obviously couldn’t calm her while believing the stressful thought that I HAD TO calm her. Without that thought, what naturally happened was just experiencing being true love, and this is what is actually needed when there is no obvious physical need. Everything else requires effort and becomes draining.
Being infinite love requires no effort. It is not “positive thinking”. It is what happens before thinking begins. It is the difference between focusing on “G-d” and letting yourself be one with “G-d”— surrendering and letting everything happen through you instead of being done by you.
I used to think that this experience of complete surrender into infinite love and consciousness was something that only happened by the grace of G-d, and therefore was ephemeral and sporadic. But I have learned that consciousness is actually a muscle that can be exercised (by doing body-awareness and thought-questioning exercises, or by praying in a way that invokes real surrender instead of just feeling safe).
In any moment, you can choose to fully embrace believing your thoughts, or choose to fully embrace consciousness/G-d/surrendering. I think this is what that “Jesus” guy was talking about when he said to give up all possessions and follow him. I don’t think he was talking about morals or afterlife; I think he was talking about having freedom from suffering NOW. I think he was talking about giving up all of your baggage (in every moment that you remember that you can) and embracing what is happening in THIS moment instead of believing that you know better than the universe what SHOULD be happening in this moment. Such sweet bliss is available in every moment, but we often pick “being right” over it.
